tips on dealing with a extreme extrovert brother on vacation

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supervillin
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tips on dealing with a extreme extrovert brother on vacation

Postby supervillin » Fri Jul 24, 2015 12:59 pm

any tips would be greatly appreciated.

my brother is an extreme extrovert and a bit needy too, haha. my family and i are going on vacation next weekend and sharing a house. my brother is bringing his two daughters and one of their friends. im hoping they will be spending their time at the beach and boardwalk on their own but if it is anything like past vacations my brother will be expecting me to go along with all their plans.

the problem is my brother doesnt invite me to do things with him, he simply mentions what the plans are and i'm automatically expected to go along. if i dont go along it starts a week long guilt trip as he attempts to make the vacation a living hell, i think this is why his own wife flat out refuses to go on long vacations with him, haha, and now i'm expected to fill in for her i guess. problem is ive been sick, dont have a ton of money and ill be with my wife so i cant babysit him the entire time (did i mention hes in his 40s!). i dont have the energy to put up with it and had i know ahead of time that he was going i probably would have planned my week to come the second half of the week when he left (like everyone else did, haha).

i'm trying to get a hold of him before we go and mention something like "hey i've been sick and we are a bit broke so sorry we wont be up for doing much besides going to the beach". i just hate how needy he is and if i dont do everything with him he tries to bully me and make my vacation a living hell, again i can now see why his wife refuses to go on vacation with him, smart woman. i think my only hope is to mention before we get there that i've been sick and dont have cash, and then try to ignore him and keep saying why i wont be hanging out with him the week we are there. what was supposed to be a relaxing week to recharge with my family has now become a test of endurance with a hyperactive needy extrovert.

its funny because their will be six other people in the house who are totally ok with whatever i want to do anytime i feel like doing it, but when my brother is there, its like the social police are following me around harassing me and telling me i have to spend every waking second socializing.....ahhhh shit! i think my only hope is enough of a group forms for him that me and my wife can go and do our own thing, and when we are all at the house he will be pleasant.

thanks for listening to my rant, any advice for dealing with this kind of situation especially from those who have experience with dealing with this i would love to hear what you think! in all honesty i really enjoy my brothers company in small doses and wish there was a way i could tell him i dont want to spend all my time with him without hurting his feelings.

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Justwatching
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Re: tips on dealing with a extreme extrovert brother on vacation

Postby Justwatching » Fri Jul 24, 2015 10:58 pm

supervillin wrote:my family and i are going on vacation next weekend and sharing a house.


That's where you went wrong, right there.

supervillin wrote:my brother is bringing his two daughters and one of their friends


Oh, it gets better! I'm gettin' some pop corn for this.

supervillin wrote:brother will be expecting me to go along with all their plans.


As sure as the sun rising in the morning.

supervillin wrote:i think this is why his own wife flat out refuses to go on long vacations with him, haha, and now i'm expected to fill in for her i guess.


Lol :ecstatic:

I know it's a perfectly innocent, but my mind goes places...

supervillin wrote:i think my only hope is to mention before we get there that i've been sick and dont have cash


Presumably you feel there'd be too much fallout from being honest instead?

supervillin wrote:any advice for dealing with this kind of situation especially from those who have experience with dealing with this i would love to hear what you think!


I tend to shirk social 'obligations' without blinking. I can handle the flak and prefer it to enduring social events where I'm uncomfortable or just not interested. But I guess you want a less direct/more diplomatic approach. In which case, trying to keep him distracted with other groups and activities will be your best bet. Keeping that up for a week will be difficult, so I wish you the very best of luck.

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supervillin
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Re: tips on dealing with a extreme extrovert brother on vacation

Postby supervillin » Sat Jul 25, 2015 1:57 am

HILARIOUS, haha, seeing my thoughts mirrored that way is actually hilarious and insightful, thanks for the post!

Justwatching wrote:I tend to shirk social 'obligations' without blinking. I can handle the flak and prefer it to enduring social events where I'm uncomfortable or just not interested.


i'm priting this out and putting it in my wallet for the week i'm at the beach! i've never heard it put like that,there is some real wisdom there i think, haha! thanks

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SandWshooter
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Re: tips on dealing with a extreme extrovert brother on vacation

Postby SandWshooter » Mon Jul 27, 2015 2:56 am

Get a cattle prod, keep him in line
Hi, mac!


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