Introvert dilemma

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s0050506
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Introvert dilemma

Postby s0050506 » Fri May 01, 2015 11:14 am

I'm crazy about this girl. The way she looks at me, the things she tells me during private lunches, yeah she likes my company too. She's the colleague sitting next to me at my new job. But... the world-class girl that she is, if i'd kiss her, can't get rid of this feeling she'd get bored with me within two weeks. I'm a big introvert you know, and grateful for it, but in the process of becoming truly confident about it. Can't risk that hard earned self-love for some foolish feeling. Can't help to act cool in front her, I WANT her to like me. And then I think, good job pretender. How can I stop feeling unworthy of her, how to shed this fear that she'd be disappointed soon enough?

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SandWshooter
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Re: Introvert dilemma

Postby SandWshooter » Sat May 02, 2015 4:31 am

Go for it or she'll eventually move on. At least if you try it might go very well
Hi, mac!

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Daisy
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Re: Introvert dilemma

Postby Daisy » Sat May 02, 2015 5:34 am

Welcome s0050506, Just be your natural self, and see how it works out. :yes:

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SandWshooter
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Re: Introvert dilemma

Postby SandWshooter » Sat May 02, 2015 4:17 pm

Daisy wrote:Welcome s0050506, Just be your natural self, and see how it works out. :yes:


JUS B URSELF!!! :lol:
Hi, mac!

s0050506
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Re: Introvert dilemma

Postby s0050506 » Sat May 02, 2015 4:59 pm

Aye thanks. Jus be me.

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Justwatching
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Re: Introvert dilemma

Postby Justwatching » Sat May 02, 2015 6:53 pm

s0050506 wrote:How can I stop feeling unworthy of her, how to shed this fear that she'd be disappointed soon enough?


It's called self-esteem. You need to get some. I know, I know - easier said than done. But seriously, feeling like that is dysfunctional.

llw14
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Re: Introvert dilemma

Postby llw14 » Sun May 03, 2015 2:01 am

Look at it this way, if you keep pretending, you may "win" her but you'll have to keep it up forever. If you be yourself, you'll know early on if she'll accept that about you or not. If she can't then you're not meant to be anyway. If you fake it, you'll grow resentful of her once the honeymoon period ends and you'll be miserable.

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Orientalist
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Re: Introvert dilemma

Postby Orientalist » Thu May 07, 2015 4:34 am

Yeah, go for it. But no need to try and act cool. Later on she will know it was an act.
If the truth hurts, you ain't livin' right.

tongue35
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Re: Introvert dilemma

Postby tongue35 » Tue May 12, 2015 4:46 pm

yeah over the course of many years ive learned you cannot pretend to be a different person to win over a girl or attract someone..they will eventually see you for who you really are..thats the introverts dilemma imo as i find it very difficult to attract a girl being my naturally reclusive introverted self..as the old saying goes, you have to be yourself or else its doomed to fail anyways..

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MrCawfle
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Re: Introvert dilemma

Postby MrCawfle » Fri Jun 05, 2015 2:11 pm

She might dig you BECAUSE you're an introvert. My wife and I have a 25 year history. She's really blossomed in that time. With my introverted, non-confrontational ways, I've just gotten out of the path of her boulder rolling downhill (uphill, actually). It's a whole yin and yang thing. Do you really want to date a person who's just like you?

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Emusing
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Re: Introvert dilemma

Postby Emusing » Sun Jun 07, 2015 12:32 pm

s0050506 wrote:...can't get rid of this feeling she'd get bored with me within two weeks.

Your quote above is almost exactly what my boyfriend said to me when I first returned his interest in me. He said "I'm afraid that one day you're going to realize that I'm actually really boring", and that put me at ease because I was afraid of the same thing.

There's been some really great comments here I strongly agree with, especially on the lines of - if she can't accept you for who you are, then it isn't going to work out anyway.

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MrCawfle
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Re: Introvert dilemma

Postby MrCawfle » Sun Jun 07, 2015 5:23 pm

This was a BIG thing with me. Does she get your jokes? I felt that girls who got my jokes could understand me on a level that mattered.

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Emusing
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Re: Introvert dilemma

Postby Emusing » Mon Jun 08, 2015 3:40 am

That is a good point MrCawfle, shared sense of humor is really vital in the long run, it's like seeing the world in a similar light.


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