Being an extrovert's friend...

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Being an extrovert's friend...

Postby merryrolling » Sun Nov 09, 2014 3:02 pm a little bit hard.
I have this female friend who is extremely an extrovert, and it's already starting to take a toll on me.
We were classmates in nursing school, but we weren't really close that time. It was just hi's and hellos between us then. I entered med school just recently and found out that she did too. I knew no one so I approached her, and instantly we clicked and became buddies. I thought she was as introverted as I am. But as time passes by, I am finding out how extremely opposite we are. She's just so energetic and loud all the time, and can make friends and talk with ease to anyone. I on the other hand, usual introvert. Shy, reserved, quiet, awkward.

Being with this friend of mine just emphasizes how this society of ours is extrovert-ideal, and it fuels my feeling of inferiority because of my introversion. My friend is quite popular in class, she's everyone's friend. For instance, we were out together and met a bunch of our classmates, and instantly their attention went to her. It's like nobody even noticed me there. There was also a time when she pulled me into going to a party with her, and I obliged in my vain efforts of trying to "come out of my shell" and reach out to others. Once we arrived, everyone was calling her, talking to her, pulling her towards their groups while I was left standing stupidly alone not knowing what to do. That time then I definitely regretted going with her.

Being a friend with someone like her makes me feel like I should change myself and be like her. I couldn't avoid comparing myself to her. Maybe its because I envy how easily she handles herself in social situations, and how easily she can talk to anyone and gain friends, which I obviously struggle with.
Honestly, it makes me feel sad that I can't seem to make friends with my classmates, while she does this easily, and I feel like they don't want to because of how quiet and reserved I am. Does anybody feel the same way?1

(Right now though, I found this book by Susan Cain, Quiet, and I'm teaching myself how to accept and be true to who and how I am, and use it to my advantage.)

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Being an extrovert's friend...

Postby Orientalist » Mon Nov 10, 2014 4:04 am

In school I was an extrovert's friend, and I got quite a few dates as a result. :D

But, yeah, it's horrible going to a party and nobody notices you. I recently went to a school reunion and no one talked to me!
If the truth hurts, you ain't livin' right.

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